Occold - Past articles

....on Growing Older

by Cyntha Capey
Suffolk Inter-Faith Resource

The last edition of the Oracle contained the photograph of the face of an elderly lady. The original was part of the Faces of Suffolk Exhibition which had been on display in Occold Church in May. Many who saw the exhibition were particularly moved by this photo – so much could be read in the lines and expression on her face. It was impossible to ignore her presence.

As the proportion of elderly people in society increases, they become more visible and there are questions that we all have to face, including whether to retire and at what age. FW Deedes has just died at the age of 94, still writing weekly columns for the Daily Telegraph, after a fulfilling and active life in politics and journalism.

There is also the question of how we can best care for our frail elderly. This week a report has been published about the dreadful way many old people are neglected and abused, highlighting the lack of appropriate facilities for their care.

The arguments for being older and active are compelling. Being active can help to keep one physically fit and mentally alert. One can postpone being a burden to family and state. One can contribute to society positively by staying in employment or engaging in voluntary work.

However, even if it is postponed, there usually comes a time when ill health, or frailty or poverty may intervene and it is no longer possible to be older and active. Then one may be faced with dealing with a state of dependence or loneliness for which no preparation has been made.

Alternatively, the strain of over-exertion may cause our sudden death which allows no opportunity for putting our ‘house’ in order, including the repairing of damaged relationships.

Old age should be valued for its own sake. Society should respect and honour its elderly citizens whether or not they are productive! This principle is at the heart of many cultures. Friends of mine from other faiths are shocked at the way we treat our seniors in general and our elderly relatives in particular.

But a fruitful old age is built on a continuing personal journey which has an inward as well as an outer dimension. Every person should take time to continue their inner journey.

“Old men ought to be explorers” writes TS Eliot in Four Quartets.

“We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.”

This is in stark contrast to what I remember of a book by PD James, “The Children of Men”, in which after an active life until a state-specified age, the old are compelled to accept a “Quietus”, a voluntary mass suicide – like casting off a boatful of 80 year olds from Southwold pier, never to be seen again.

NB Those of us less well read than Cynthia, may remember the same theme in an episode of Star Trek! Andy